Smack My Ass And Call Me Santa - Merry Christmas! If I could give you some advice from my Christmas past, never pull down Santa's pants and smack him on the ass. It was last Christmas and it was very winy. Santa must have slipped and got stuck in the chimney. I don't know what I was thinking or what came over me, but I ran behind the Santa and dropped to one knee. I pulled back my hand and with all my might, smacked Santa's ass and then laughed with delight. Santa turned to me and said "son this year you will be at a loss, you get no presents only my special hot sauce". Then he pulled out this bottle and said with a shout "I hope this burns on the way in and on he way out." Ingredients: Habañero peppers, carrots, onions, vinegar, garlic, lime juice and salt.